Discipline and Co-Parenting God’s Way

Hey y’all! Per some requests, I’m making a COMEBACK on my blog, and I’m sharing some tough truths with you today about parenting….{insert fraudy feelings of “Who am I to give advice?” } ahem….

Some fun facts about me:

• I am VERY indepedent
• I am an ACTION taker!
• I envision a solution to a problem, and I want to see it play out RIGHT NOW.

Not bad traits, but when it comes to marriage and raising kiddos, they can be. Why? Because God didn’t call me to do this alone.

In fact, He paired me up with a WONDERFUL man who has some pretty great ideas and thoughts on how to raise our kids as well. I just have to stop and seek his counsel, hash it out together and then we are winning!

So I wanted to share some of my best tips for co-parenting for all you independent women out there like me…cause if you’re reading this, and I’ve branded myself well, you’re JUST like me…

4 tips for Co-Parenting Well

• Be slow to speak… I know. I know. It’s hard. But you can do it with practice. When my boys do something they shouldn’t, I want to take ACTION NOW! But I’ve learned that I often REACT instead of ACT, and that’s not healthy. When one of them acts out, I send them to their room to give us BOTH time to think about it.
• Be quick to include your spouse… Obviously, if Milo calls Henry a “butt head” {yeah, that happened yesterday…} or something like that, I correct, encourage and move on. But on the more serious matters like getting in trouble at school, lying to me, or intentionally hurting one another, I make it clear that I will NOT decide their punishment alone. This shows the boys that not only am I not the sole decision maker, but also shows them the respect I have for their father’s input. That’s important to me. I want them to seek out wives who respect them, and I get a chance to model that every day.
• Deliver the punishment together... When I do seek Matt’s counsel on disciplining and even rewarding our boys, I find that it is more effective for them if we deliver the news together. It shows a united front, models a positive relationship for them, and allows us as parents to show that we BOTH love them and choose to discipline them out of that love.
• Pray with them together.… I heard a wise woman say once that whenever we discipline our children, we should always end it in prayer. I love that! It’s so easy to get busy, punish them and say let’s move on! But guiding them in how to seek forgiveness and reminding them of the gracious love of our Father prevents bitterness from taking root. I love when Matt and I get to pray over our boys together. Anytime! But especially when they’ve gotten in trouble. Again, it models our love for each other as much as it does for them.

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11

That’s all I got… I’m sure that raising these two beautiful boys with this handsome man will bring me more nuggets of wisdom over the years to come. And GOSH I am excited about it!

We get one life.
We get one precious family.
God intended for that family unit to last.
I’m gonna do all I can to make sure it does!

If you’re a single parent and doing it alone, please know that I am not excluding you! I am here to encourage and pray for you as well and would love that opportunity if you need an encouraging word! Keep fighting to the good fight no matter what your family unit looks like! I’m rooting for ya!

xoxo,

Rach